The scene was tense. The clients were bleary-eyed from a restless night of sleep, sipping coffee and praying for peace after years of litigation. The mediation was scheduled for 8:30 a.m., but only the defendants (the parties who had been sued) were present. The attorney nervously looked at the clock, hoping the plaintiff (the party who had filed the lawsuit) would decide to accept their settlement offer in mediation instead of continuing with this endless, emotionally taxing legal saga.
Many years prior, someone had been offended by a business decision made by someone else, and now the plaintiff was suing his own family members to even the score. The plaintiff demanded unreasonable sums of money and was no longer open to resolving the dispute peacefully. The plaintiff had already spent thousands of dollars on trial lawyers, attempting to use a secular court system to resolve a financial dispute against Christian family members. The deeper the plaintiff burrowed into the lawsuit, the more personal and the less reasonable the plaintiff became.
As a last resort, the parties finally agreed to use a mediator to help settle their differences, a helpful option that could have been used at the beginning of the disagreement.
Lawsuits are filed too frequently, even among Anabaptists. Feelings get hurt and people get offended, and when those conflicts are ignored or mishandled, they can explode like a rusty landmine in the frozen Serbian tundra. Rather than embracing hard conflicts and using Matthew 18 to resolve the matter promptly, sometimes people allow a conflict to simmer under the surface until one day it reaches the breaking point.
Throwing Scripture and caution to the wind, an angry party storms into a secular attorney and offers to pay them to “fight” their brothers and sisters. At that point, it really does not matter who is legally right or wrong; the church of Christ has already lost. Lawsuits can bring spiritual consequences that last far longer than the length of a jury trial.
Scripture gives many wise instructions for resolving conflicts peacefully.
Our Principles Will Cost Us Something
A Reflection on 1 Corinthians 6:7.
“Now therefore there is utterly a fault among you, because ye go to law one with another. Why do ye not rather take wrong? why do ye not rather suffer yourselves to be defrauded?”
Paul’s words in 1 Corinthians 6:7 land with uncomfortable force. They cut against nearly every instinct we have for self-protection, fairness, and justice. After all, we live in a world where defending one’s rights is praised, standing one’s ground is celebrated, and “winning” is the ultimate goal. Yet Paul points out that even before the court case begins, the believers involved have already lost.
Paul is addressing the Christians in Corinth who were taking one another to secular courts. However, his concern was not primarily legal—it was spiritual. The fault he addresses is not about the verdict, but about the damage already done to the Christian witness, unity, and love when believers take one another before a secular court to settle disagreements.
The loss does not belong to the one who loses the case. The loss belongs to the brothers and sisters in Christ who have decided that being right matters more than being reconciled.
The loss does not belong to the one who loses the case. The loss belongs to the brothers and sisters in Christ who have decided that being right matters more than being reconciled.
Paul reframes the natural mindset entirely. He instructs that public litigation between believers signals a deeper failure, a failure to live out the Gospel we claim to believe. When disputes escalate to the point of lawsuits, something far more valuable than money or property is already at stake: the testimony of Christ’s transforming power.
This principle can be difficult to accept when a stack of money, or a family farm, or a valuable business are at stake. However, living by Christian principles will cost you something. If your principles never cost you anything, you’d better re-evaluate your principles.
Imagine if someone approached you with a contract and said, “I have the best deal imaginable for you. I am offering you one million dollars, a fully stocked dairy farm in Lancaster, and a beautiful log cabin in the mountains for the hunting season—and they are all absolutely free! The only condition is that you sacrifice your brother’s salvation. Just sign here, and it is all yours to enjoy.” That would sound like a deal from the devil, but yet, how often are we willing to risk the salvation of our parents, siblings, and children when we violate Biblical principles? How often are we willing to push, pull, and grab for material things of this life for our own personal gain?
Are we willing to surrender earthly things that might be legally ours if it brings family peace? Are we quick to stand up for our legal rights, regardless of the spiritual or eternal cost?
Why Not Rather Be Defrauded?
Paul’s question here is jolting: Why not rather take wrong? Why not rather be defrauded? He is not endorsing injustice as good or denying that wrongdoing exists. Instead, he is calling believers to calculate wins and losses differently than the world.
The Gospel itself is built on this cornerstone. Jesus was wronged. Jesus was cheated. Jesus absorbed injustice rather than retaliating, and through that physical loss, He achieved the ultimate victory. Paul is asking the Corinthian church, and by extension us, whether we truly believe that the cross changes how we respond to personal harm.
Choosing to be wronged is not weakness, but an act of faith and love. It says, I trust God more than I trust the temporal riches I might secure through a secular court. It says, I love God more than I love a hill of dirt with some cattle on it. It says, I care more about eternal wealth than earthly wealth. It says, I love my brother more than I love my bank account.
Living The Cross-Shaped Life
In a culture obsessed with asserting rights, Paul introduces a radical Christian ethic, which teaches that sometimes surrendering what we are owed is more powerful than collecting it. Sometimes preserving unity speaks louder than proving a point. Sometimes the Gospel advances not through winning, but through yielding.
1 Corinthians 6:7 invites Believers to live cross-shaped lives in everyday conflict. It asks whether we believe God is big enough to handle unfairness without our constant intervention. It challenges us to value the reputation of Christ above our personal vindication.
The world understands power as domination. The Gospel reveals power through sacrifice. When Christians choose reconciliation over retaliation, humility over hostility, and love over litigation, they demonstrate that they belong to a different Kingdom.
Do we see loss the way the world does, or the way the cross does?
Conclusion
There is a better way than engaging in litigation within the church. One option to consider is using a neutral, third-party mediator to help bring the parties together. Next month, we will explore some practical steps for addressing and resolving conflict.
Tyler Hochstetler, Esq., is an Anabaptist attorney in Lancaster, Pennsylvania. He and his wife Heather have five children. Tyler is the managing attorney of Hochstetler Law Firm, P.C., a firm which focuses on serving the Anabaptist community and nonprofit organizations. Their attorneys are licensed in numerous states, and their contact information is: Hochstetler Law Firm, P.C., 1028 Sharp Ave., Ephrata, PA 17522; 2452 S. Seminole Trail, Madison, VA 22727; 717.459.7877; www.hochstetlerlaw.com.